Expectations...

"There's a reason why people say we shouldn't expect too much, no one wants to see someone they care about end up disappointed. We instinctively act to protect our own from being hurt, and do what we can to make the right choices for people we love. But the reason we have expectations in the first place, is because we want to aim as high as we can. Because when you love someone, there's no limit to what you can accomplish." Heard this at a time when I probably needed to hear it the most. Was going through one of those phases where whoever u turn to is so engrossed in their own lives that there is no time for anyone else. It is at these times that you feel you should have had more people you could turn to in the first place but that doesn't solve the problem. Because no matter no matter how many people you are close to there is bound to come a time when they all will be busy. So you are back to square one. You may ask, where do expectations fit in all of this. Having that expectation from a close friend is the reason you called them up in the first place. You wanting your closest friends to be there is your expectations. You wanting them to understand that you are going through a low phase is your expectation. Every relation has its expectations. No matter how much try not to expect, no matter how much you convince yourself that you are not looking forward to something from that person, the expectations will always be there. They may be hidden but there none the less. Frankly, the closer you are to people the more the expectations there will be. Its human nature. But those expectations will differ from people to people. I am not saying they won't be there. They will be there, no doubt about that. They will just be something that you have suppressed, because you know that by expecting those things you will hurt yourself. Getting hurt is the biggest reason people don't want to have expectations. This is where that dialogue makes so much of sense. If you love someone, be it your parents, siblings, friends, boyfriend, girlfriend, you will always have those expectations, both from yourself and them. The expectations you have from yourself will make you a better person because you will always want to achieve more to make the other person happy. The expectations that you have from the other person will make you a better father, mother, sister, friend, because what you expect from them is somewhere what you do for them. So to expect more you will always do more for them. So having expectations is not bad. It’s actually good, provided you draw a line somewhere. You should have expectations in the sense that you should do what you would expect in return but after doing that you should forget the expectation. Because that is what hurts. That expectation that because i did something the other person should also reciprocate is what pulls us down. Because if our expectations are not fulfilled, we don't make the same effort the next time and that is what causes problems in the relationship. So expect the most from yourself because that is in your hand to give and achieve. Expect the best from others but be prepared for the worst because that way you will enjoy and appreciate every little action and gesture of theirs.